Alice in Realityland #7

“ What madam? You don’t drive??”. This is maybe the nine hundredth time she had to answer in the negative and it was getting way too embarrassing. Alice decided that she had to do something about it. She knew that the world saw her in a different light - young, confident and capable career woman; but deep down she was still the li’l Alice who gripped Rachel tight while crossing the road. 

One fine morning she announced that she was going to get a bicycle. Everyone around her laughed out loud. “A bicycle Alice?? Are you crazy? Wouldn’t learning how to drive a car be far more useful to you than getting a bicycle ?”. Even her little one giggled as if her mom was acting weird. But Alice was adamant, and she did get the bicycle on that very day despite all protests. There was no one who could deter her.

This was not Alice’s first time riding a bicycle. Although she had learned to balance way back in her pre- teens she didn’t have much experience riding one in her  teenage or later. She had always been happy on the carriage of Rachel’s bicycle. While an irritated Rachel rode, li’l Alice sang out loud happily.

Riding in her 30’s, thus was a totally new experience for Alice. She befriended her new bicycle and decided to take it slow, one pedal at a time. She noticed that riding slow, just like going fast, can be thrilling as well. It opens your eyes to things you might overlook while on an Uber ride. It taught her that the city was not just about the hideous wart like structures which suffocates but had beautiful green patches which lets you breathe. 

The unhurried pace taught her that riding a bike was like steering through life. It’s about keeping the balance and moving forward. There might be difficult uphills which test the strength of your legs but it will always be followed by quite exhilarating downhill rides. There might be humps and gutters which are wearying but somehow you have to look straight, pedal and move on.

Alice learnt that to calculate and negotiate, with the pedestrians and other varied vehicles that hurried by, is a skill which can be earned through experience . You might feel insignificant on your sluggish two- wheeler , but it will teach you to be patient and always give you the best view from the margins. 

She was quite surprised by the revelations she gained during the unrushed activity and the li’l Alice inside her wondered if Rachel would have ever thought of these aspects when she was proudly whizzing around the town on her red bicycle.Alice  realised that getting  the bicycle was the best decision she had made and holding on to the handlebars she smiled at the world around her.

Summer

I kept it under the lid,

tight and safe;

silent effervescence, water- trapped

in a green bottle with a blue marble .

A summer child’s longing eyes on the codd-neck,

lining the old man’s box- shack, 

after cricket on a sweltering afternoon;

déjà vu.

The bottle pops and explodes,

fizzes...

the sour outpourings of the soul

corrosive on the lips.

Alice in Realityland #6

Summers were a boring affair and li’l Alice was weary during that part of the day as usual. The hour of the power cut! Going without power during day time was ok. She could do something even when she was bored like- watching the sparrows, or playing hide and seek with her cousins (at grandma’s home) or at least going for a ride on the bicycle ( herself happily seated on the rear  while Rachel grudgingly tagged her along answering her stupid questions ). But power cuts in the late evening... err... she hated it!

One thing she enjoyed the most, however on summer evenings, unlike school days, was watching television uninterrupted. On school days TV time was rationed. But, lo, again during vacation she couldn’t watch it as uninterrupted as she wanted to. Why? Because of the biggest villain — the  POWER CUT!!!

Power cuts were a daily routine during that time and li’l Alice hated it more than anything when it ate into her TV time on the National channel. The soap operas would be telecast only for a few hours, that too only till 10 at night. How insensitive on the part of the electricity board!

As there was nothing else to do during “the hour”, the whole family would take a trip upstairs. It was especially pleasant when the moon was out. They would carry a mat and lie down watching the skies. Sometimes, Appa and Rachel tried to figure out the constellations and then Rachel would go into raptures about the wonders of the universe. It was her secret wish to work for NASA. Although, all these things were beyond Alice’s comprehension she still listened to it keenly.

At other times they would play a word game...something like a scrabble but without the board. Appa would start with a letter from the alphabet, then construct a word and with the last letter the next person would construct another word. This game helped li’l Alice to learn a lot of words and often, she was awestruck at the number of words others around her knew. This was also the occasion for Rachel to do her verbal parade and Alice was always jealous when she did that, as Amma and Appa would appreciate Rachel more....

“Honorificabilitudinitatibus” said  Rachel with all the pride of a sesquipedalian. “She sells sea shells on the sea shore... “ shouted out li’l Alice in an attempt to outdo her sister. “That’s not a word Alice...” said Rachel “ that’s a tongue twister- don’t you know the difference? Duh!” “Then you should be using words people use...” replied an agitated Alice. “This, for your kind information, my dear sis, is something the great writer Shakespeare used”. That felt like the unkindest cut of all to li’l Alice. Mustering her wounded pride she declared “I’m not playing with you anymore” and left the arena.

Although Amma was asking them to stop the argument and not to be silly, Alice refused to join the game. She wanted to go downstairs but was too afraid of the dark. So she settled herself in a corner observing the stars while the others continued with the game. To her amazement she saw something moving in the sky. Forgetting that she was angry, she ran to them and pointed out a shooting star plummeting through the sky. She knew that her mom considered it as ill luck but Alice secretly believed that it was lucky.

In her excitement she uttered her wish aloud. “ I wish I could travel on a shooting star and reach the moon”. She had always loved the Frank Sinatra song “Fly me to the moon...” her father played on the tape recorder. It had opened a universe of possibilities to her. But to her dismay, Rachel began with her argumentation - with her rockets, NASA, Neil Armstrong and the scientific impossibility of Alice’s whole project.  Although angry with her sis once again, Alice knew that Rachel is right and remained quiet.  There was a smile on li’l Alice’s lips, however, and slowly did a “moonwalk” when no was watching cause in her mind she was riding on the shooting star from one planet to the next in a jiffy. Power cut was not a bad thing at all after all li’l Alice realised. It could make her “dream-magine” at least and she laughed!

Insanity

I place the knife on it

pressing its sharp edge gently

on the smooth hard husk,

then peel it layer by layer; 

tugging first, at the thick outer casing,

then remove the spongy membrane 

delicately, 

to reveal varied chambers of rubies.

They stain my thin long fingers,

these fleshy jewels,as I pick them out,

the only way to cure...they tell me...

I take,

a cluster of cardinal joy, accordingly, and

lay them tenderly on the plate...

Next a bunch of garnets,

of fear and other anxieties;

a conglomeration of fury follows,

scarlet berries popping and exploding on the platter,

and finally the sanguine debilitating pain,

rotting seeds which I reluctantly throw away, 

a reminder of my pomegranate days...

Conversation on a Saturday Afternoon

I long for that long chirpy saturday lunch
when in the air-conditioned cafe
we sat sipping iced-tea, lime soda and a smoothie
the three of us spilling beans...

A woman who threw herself
from the tenth floor crept in
with her depression.
Next was the creaking bones
and the body
which no longer is what it used to be...

We munched on the memories
of our last meeting
and of our travels in between
from visiting a temple to a nude spa...

We drew dotted lines on a flat map
marking our next destination
and remembered the taste of cocktail we drank
last time in the far East.

I long for those minutes
of absolute bliss when I could dive
into that beautiful world of books, art and memories
than live in this rut of extreme stupidity, 

where not even a modicum of sense crawls in...

Packets

I have my life
arranged in little packets.

A pack of meat, eggs and vegetables,
I marinate, beat and cut
to feed the hunger rising from my depths.

A packed basket of clothes,
to suit every occasion, and,
to cover the little things i feel in between.

And of course an ice- pack,
to soothe my swollen joints
or maybe a bruised heart.

Dead Weight

You promised to let me fly
into the heights of the infinite sky,
and you did fly with me
in exhilarating joy;
but I realize love, now,
that your love was -
weighing down-
down by my ankle
like a dead dead weight,
not letting me soar,
nor letting me drift,
even towards
the nearly distant shore...